Become An Inspiring Speaker

Monday, November 29, 2010

How Likeable Are You?

I have been listening to an audio book entitled “The Likeability Factor” by Tim Sanders. This is an excellent content rich book about what characteristics make people more likeable and how these qualities make them more successful. Sanders states that a person’s “L” factor or “likeability factor” has to do with four key concepts.

1. Friendliness. People make greater efforts to help people they like and who treat them with kindness and respect. Communicating positive feelings.

2. Reciprocation. When people are friendly, you want to reciprocate.

3. Relevance. How does another person connect to your life? Find out what another person’s passions are; this can include their hobbies or interests and remember to also share your passions with them. He recommends that we seek to understand how the person we have met has significance in in our own lives. When someone fulifills our needs they have satisfied a "sweet spot", therefore they become more relevant to us. We can also seek what significance we have to the other person in return.

4. Empathy. Ask about another person’s feelings or think about what you would feel like if you were in their situation. Form an emotional connection and show that you really care. By being empathetic versus simply sympathetic makes you become more likeable. He uses the movie “Groundhog Day” as an example of how a character who insults others can learn how to become empathetic and thus more likeable.

People who are likeable get better treatment and also get their needs met. Sanders elaborates on how the reader can become more likeable with fabulous tips and techniques. Great book for all areas of your life!

One exercise that I enjoyed was...

Think about the qualities that you most often get complemented on. These are some of the “likeability” qualities that people receive from you. Often the qualities you like in others are qualities you also possess. Insightful!

This is definitely a book you need to read or listen to more than once. Better yet add it to your library collection. There is so much great content to apply to your life right now.

Be Likeable from the Inside and Out!

Debra