Your ASK Matters

Have you ever wondered what would have happened if you only asked for what you wanted and needed? Life is kind of like a high school dance from the movies. You sit along the walls of life waiting for opportunity to come and ask you to dance. However, when opportunity arises, you may feel uncomfortable as you reluctantly reach for out toward it. The dance may seem awkward at first but slowly you develop a rhythm. The dance is light and you are swept off your feet. Why? Because others around you have supported you, all because you got up and met opportunity instead of sitting down.

I use this analogy because I have seen time after time, myself included, where you have the opportunity to ask for help and you stop. You stop just as you start to pick up momentum. The music that is playing in your head of chatter starts saying things like this:

"Why would they want to help me?"
"They are so influential and accomplished. I am out of their league."
"You are just going to make a fool or yourself. They will probably laugh."
"They do not have the time of day for me."

Think just for moment. What is the answer right now, without even asking. You are correct if you said a resounding, "NO!" You have not even asked. Your odds improve when you ask for what you want but there is a technique to asking. Sometimes you have to ask more than once and in a different way.

Here is some ways to ask for what you want:

1. ASK the right person or persons. Just like a business meeting, you want the right people at the table at the right time for the right issue at hand. You need to ask a person who already has the knowledge you need or knows someone who can help you.

2. ASK with confidence. You need to be fully present when you ask with no distractions. Believe you can get what you are asking for.

3. ASK knowing the answer is YES. Be prepared and do a little bit of research related to your question. Create win-win scenarios whenever possible. When each person benefits, the likelihood of getting a "YES" is high.

4. ASK with specifics. Be clear and specific in what you ask for. You do not often need to give a rundown of the past 6 months in detail. Time is precious so you need to highlight important facts and ask specifically for what you want. The more clarity to your question, the more likely you will receive a "YES".

There are 3 details I want you to remember: People may be waiting for you to ask them because of their own fears and internal chatter. People naturally want to help people. Your ask can also lead to more asks, new friendships, joint ventures, and introductions to people you show know.

Your ASK matters. As some of you know, my husband and I spearhead a shoebox campaign each year which stemmed from an item on my bucket list. My Bucket List Item is ... an all expense paid trip to Ukraine with my family and parents to deliver shoeboxes to an orphanage in Ukraine so we could see the children faces light up as they opened the boxes. We have sent shoeboxes overseas but I am determined to see the excitement and joy of Christmas in their faces. One day I had a light bulb moment, I made an "ask" to a local school to be a part of my dream. They said, "YES!" We started helping 120 children, 3 years ago and have now we have reached 617. The ripple affect it has had on our colleagues, family, and friends has been tremendous. If I had not asked, the warmth I feel in my heart and the smiles and the tears I saw on the children faces and volunteers would not have come to pass.

How many people are waiting for you to ask? How many people want to be a part of your success story? How much better would the world be if you only made the ASK? Your ASK matters.

I Hope You Dance....

I Beg Your Pardon...You Wanted a Rose Garden?

Every year I nurture a rose garden near my deck. I laugh because I use to think roses smelled like the air fresheners that you put in the bathroom near your toilet bowl, so your bathroom smelled like a porcelain bowl of roses. Now times have changed....I do not buy rose air fresheners. Instead, I have the real thing..aahhh much better. White roses are my favorite!

My parents' song as a couple has always been I Beg Your Pardon I Never Promised You a Rose Garden by Lynn Anderson. My father plants and nurtures a rose garden for my mother as a reminder of this song so I guess that's why I now do the same. What's so special about a rose? Not only is it a symbol of love (good times) but if you note there are also thorns (bad times or failures) on roses. No matter what thorns (mistakes/failures) you encounter along the way, you are sure to receive abundance and beauty as you nurture the rose garden of your life with consistency and care. Rose love moisture and sunlight. The energy brings forth beautiful blooms of flowering results. It is how you get through those times, that makes your stronger, more resilient, and more courageous than you have ever thought.



If you are feeling like something in your life is not going as it should for you right now, nurture it with love and energy. You have the resources available to you to move through it and you do not need to do it alone. Ask for the help you need to get a project done. Soon enough you will be smelling real roses from the garden in which you sow. Stop and smell your roses of success!

Believe You Deserve It

One of the greatest things holding us back from living to our highest potential is that we question whether or not, we deserve what we desire.There is enough in the world for everyone to go after their dreams and goals. My vision for my life is not the same as yours. It belongs to you and no one else. The big question is, " Who can tell us that we do not deserve something?" You have a choice. You have the choice to ask for what you want with the intention that you will receive what you ask for.

"If you follow your bliss, doors will open for you that wouldn't have opened for anyone else." - Joseph Campbell.

Know What You Want. Clarity is the key. You must have a clear idea of what you are asking for and why. You will only receive what you want to the extent that you were clear. What does your end result look like? You are the one in control when you ask the question you wish to ask. How will the person you are asking benefit from your "ask"? Think about it. If you created an "ask" based on a win-win relationship, why would the answer be no?
Believe, it is possible and you deserve it. If you do not ask with confidence and conviction, the person you are asking may wonder how important it would be to answer your question. How bad do you want it? You may want to role-play with a colleague or practice in the mirror before you ask. You are meant to be, do , and have great things in your life. You need to BELIEVE IT!


Go out and ask for what you want!

The Power of Asking For What You Want

Many people become paralyzed at thought of asking for what they want. They fear the answer may be no!If you do not ask for what you want the answer will always be no!The power of asking the right question helps us gain knowledge, clarify information, and get what we want.

In the past year, I have learned some very simple techniques that have served me well in asking for what I want:

1. Know that you can ask for what you  want.
2. Discover why you are afraid of asking.
3. Be very clear about what you want to ask and why.
4. Whenever possible, create a win-win with the person you are asking.
5. Believe that you deserve what you ask for.

As each person gets in the habit of asking for what they want, the asking gets easier each time. Ask! Ask! Ask!